My belly grows while my extremities shrink

After getting my energy going today, I felt a little better than I have in the past. I have been doing pretty well over the past four or five days and I am hoping that my bowels will continue to improve. I am now starting to think that I may have some sort of problem like inflamed bowels, but it is possible that I have simply develop more sensitivity within that region of my body.

I am becoming increasingly aggravated at how small my legs (lower legs) and forearms are becoming. I don't know how much smaller my forearms can get, but my legs and arms are starting to look like a virtual skeleton and much like the individuals that I used to decry for looking so sickly. It is amazing how my face, neck, and belly continue to maintain the same bulk, if not more, as I had prior to injury while my extremities continue to atrophy. I am also additionally bothered by the growth of my forehead or as some would say the recession of my hairline. I am convinced this is because of medication, but it does not help my self-esteem. The encroachment of gray hair is further exasperating my anger at all of these problems which are seemingly overwhelming me lately. It seems as if over the last nine months that I am beginning to fall apart. While I am convinced this is not the case, I just need to keep my mind in the right place and continue to drive on and know that I am actually healthier than most people.

Still adjusting

I have not been writing much lately and this is primarily due to the fact that I have not been feeling well. I was having severe bowel problems, but, at a risk of speaking prematurely, I believe we have rectified most of the problems now. Currently I am having some fatigue and blood pressure problems which I believe are the direct result of the bowel difficulties I previously encountered. I am hopeful I will be able to get back to 100% within the next week or so. The good news is that I have a sufficient amount of time and should not try to rush back to my normal level of activity.

Dismal days continue

I have not written for at least a week in this is primarily because of problems with my bowels. This has become such a perplexing situation that I had not wanted to write at all. I have hoped that a new medication will allow me to start functioning are normally again, but getting used to this medication may take a little more time. I'm hopeful that I will be able to return to normalcy, at least what I call normalcy, within another week.

I may try to write more in the near future, but I am also trying to limit my intake of caffeine and this is a lot more troubling than others would think. I have been stuck in a state of discursiveness and unable to concentrate on any specific speject for a significant amount of time.

Brighter days despite the storm.

It has been quite some time since I was able to get the opportunity to write a blog. This is chiefly because I have been enormously busy over the last several days. Initially I was not feeling well because of my bowels, but I was able to get that difficulty fairly well under control. I did have a problem today, however, an early bowel regimen solve that situation. The good news is, my enormously busy schedule has made me feel significantly better emotionally. I am hoping I will be able to get back into reading and other activities I enjoyed for leisure. The work of my community is keeping me busy enough and this has been a good panacea for my doldrums. Hopefully everything will continue and I can start writing more significant blog's about what I had intended.

The first tropical storm of the season is in the Gulf of Mexico, although, it is not predicted to come to close to Tampa it is dumping significant amounts of rain. In spite of this dull weather and my inability to get out I am definitely not feeling down. That is a huge improvement and one which I do not take lightly.

Down days

I have not been making many blog so the last few days because I have been relatively down in the dumps. I did, however, managed to feel a little better just by chatting online for a few days. I am hoping that through chatting and just getting busy in the neighborhood will give me back into the swing of things. All of the problems I have encountered with borderline depression over the last few weeks has been the direct cause of the little girl's death. It seems to have brought back some dormant feelings which I thought I had dealt with previously.

Another month in the grind

Today was a difficult day for me to get through. Once again I had a hard time trying to get motivated and even more difficult time trying to figure out what I want to do in the near future. I have had my heart set on reading the new Star Wars book, but now that I have the book on computer I don't seem to be as interested as I was previously. I'm running into some frustrations, which I will not get into right here and now. Let's just say, it is something that I cannot change and the best way to handle it is to avoid the topic as much as possible. I have been wanting to write, but I can't see the past my perceived inability to write narrative stories. This is primarily because I have not written a narrative and do not want it to become a stilted predictable piece of work. I guess I just need to get on with things and start writing. I really do enjoy reading, however, lately I have not been able to find something that I am in which I am extraordinarily interested. I seem to have a desultory mind lately which continues to focus on a multitude of things without becoming overly engrossed in one. I'm hoping to narrow my scope and try to get some things done in the next few days. A lot of the problems I have been encountering lately are exasperated by the difficulty I have been encountering with my bowels. I'm eagerly anticipating get everything regulated and feel 100% once again. Tomorrow I will be going shopping and I might decide to take some extra time off and go see a movie. I need to take a break from just living my normal life. I really wish I could get a long-term or short-term goal which would definitely give me something to shoot for. I have been saying since December that I just need to come up with a goal and all I seem to be able to do is come up with a list of things I need to accomplish and then procrastinate on getting these tasks completed.